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Wholly Content; Fully Expectant

Updated: Feb 12, 2020

Hola Folks,

So, this isn’t one of the devotionals that came from my scripture reading, but this is what I call an “experiential devotional.” On Tuesday (1/17/2012) I opened my prayer journal to pray before jumping into my scripture. From time to time, I go through and re-read some of the prayers that I’ve written in this journal and I’ve asked for things such as clarity, for a relationship to work out, for revelation of my purpose, for family and friends, etc., etc., etc.

Well, on Tuesday, I cracked open my prayer journal just to talk to God and tell Him what was on my heart and when I started writing I just recognized how real Psalm 23 is. “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want…..” I can stop right there and that would sum up the revelation that I came to as I began to write in my prayer journal. For THE FIRST TIME, that I can remember, in my life I prayed a prayer and didn’t want ANYTHING, but God. I googled “the face of God” and found this, “Seeking the FACE of God and not the HAND of God.” And for the first time in my life that’s what I was doing!!! Seeking God’s FACE; God himself; seeking intimacy with HIM and not seeking what He could do for me! As minor as that may be to some folks, for me, that’s a MAJOR blessing! To get to a place where I’m not wanting God to do anything except drawn near to me!

So, that realization in and of itself was so powerful to me. Literally, I wrote my entire prayer on Tuesday in awe that I could be in this “space.” But to make it even better; on Wednesday I was reflecting on this experience to a friend and as I spoke an even further revelation came to me: For the first time in my life I was fully and completely CONTENT IN CHRIST! (O_O eyeopener. lol) Contentment was one of the things that I’d pray for constantly! One of the things I strived for! One of those things that I had to “fake it until I make it.” I wanted desperately to be able to be content where I was, but not complacent. I wanted to be content in whatever season, whatever situation, whatever circumstance that God allowed me to encounter so that I could FULLY appreciate the JOURNEY God had me on instead of discounting the journey for the sake of getting to the “destination.” I had wanted to be content for so long and now, f0r the first time, I got a glimpse of what it looked like; what it felt like; what it FEELS like to be fully CONTENT IN CHRIST!!! And when I tell you that this is one of the most freeing times in my life, I MEAN IT! To have struggled for so long being unhappy with the current season I was in, to have bucked up against God for so long because I didn’t like the route He was taking me, and then to get to the place that I earnestly wanted to be but just didn’t know HOW to get there: CONTENTMENT. To be completely at the Mercy of a Merciful God and Loving  Every Moment!

AND THEN………….. (I know you’re thinking ‘can it get any better?’ lol) What makes being in this “space” in my relationship with God in this current season of my life even better????? When I surrendered to God’s process completely; God showed me the Perfect Paradox of being “Wholly Content; but Fully Expectant.” Who knew that was possible?! (okay, you probably did, but humor me. lol) Who knew that it was possible to be content, joyful and happy even though you don’t have what you think/thought you want(ed)! It’s so hard to describe, but so peaceful to walk in: Wholly Content; Fully Expectant. I’m expectant because I know that if God can teach ME how to be content then He can do ANYTHING (raise your hand if you’re a little hard-headed. *raises both hands……. and a leg and looks around* okay, maybe it’s just me. lol) . It’s one thing to know that God can do anything and another thing to KNOW that God can do anything; and more and more I’m getting to KNOW that TRUTH in my life all because of God; All because He IS doing “anything” in my life! So, if you dare; submit yourself to God and allow Him to teach you how to be content so you too can be “WHOLLY CONTENT; BUT FULLY EXPECTANT.”

Bless God and God Bless!

THE Writer’s Pen,

Angelique

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